DREAMER'S CHALLENGE: Day 7

    Well, this is it, everybody: the last day of Dreamer's Challenge!  No more semi-personal journal entries about Megan (thank the LORD!)...
    Here is my final post for Dreamer's Challenge:


     My dream last night was bizarre: in it, I had a strange disease that caused me to grow extra limbs, and I could not figure out how to make it stop.  It was very embarrassing.  When I prayed, the extra limbs vanished.
    I was wondering if the dream could have any possible meaning for my life this morning, and then it hit me--I mean, literally HIT me--I stubbed my toe (again) on a closet door, the same toe I bust open while running on pavement a few days ago.  I needed to apply a band-aide to my toe to protect it, but the band-aide box in the closet was empty.  Frustrated, I began to despair of finding a band-aide at all, when I finally, at long-last, saw it: one protective sticker peeking its nude, flat body out from beneath a bottle of medicine.  YES!  My first impulse was to actually thank God for the discovery


...and THAT is when it hit me: God wants to heal me.  He wants me to come to HIM for help, just as He declared to me in Psalm 50:14-15 for Day 6 of Dreamer's Challenge, 

"Offer to God thanksgiving, and pay your vows to the Most High. Call upon Me in the day of trouble; I will deliver you, and you shall glorify Me.” 

I am not yet sure how this applies to my life, but now I know where I will be looking for spiritual "band-aides" from now on: Jesus.

     Final Dreamer's Challenge note: May we all not only learn to be genuinely thankful, but learn to commit our lives--both the good and the bad--into His loving hands, and allow Him to heal our spiritual wounds.


    Ardently Yours, 
    Megan

DREAMER'S CHALLENGE: Day 6

    I do not remember what I dreamed last night (I am still adhering to the "no TV" Dreamer's Challenge!), but this morning I read an interesting passage of Scripture that encouraged, awed, and disturbed all at the same time!

    If you read Psalm 50 for yourself, maybe you will see what I mean, but for those of you who do not have the time to do so, here is a summary of and few selections from the psalm:

    Psalm 50 begins with this awesome introduction of God's power:

1   The Mighty One, God the LORD,
Has spoken and called the earth
From the rising of the sun to its going down.

2 Out of Zion, the perfection of beauty,
God will shine forth.
3 Our God shall come, and shall not keep silent;
A fire shall devour before Him,
And it shall be very tempestuous all around Him. 

    The writer shifts gears and begins to document a "conversation" God has with his people, the Israelites.  He tells them that He has some complaints against them.  He starts out by clarifying that it is not His people's sacrifices that He is displeased with, for these are faithfully served at the appointed times.  He even says that the sacrifices are not the point, because what He really wants is for the Israelites to be THANKFUL, thus glorifying Him.  This proves to be His true complaint against them.  
    Next, He mentions what He wants to do for those who choose to be thankful to God:    

14 Offer to God thanksgiving,
And pay your vows to the Most High.
15 Call upon Me in the day of trouble;
I will deliver you, and you shall glorify Me.”

He then rebukes the wicked:

16 But to the wicked God says:
“What right have you to declare My statutes,
 Or take My covenant in your mouth,
17 Seeing you hate instruction
 And cast My words behind you?
18 When you saw a thief, you consented with him,
And have been a partaker with adulterers.
19 You give your mouth to evil,
And your tongue frames deceit.
20 You sit and speak against your brother;
You slander your own mother’s son.
21 These things you have done, and I kept silent;
You thought that I was altogether like you;
But I will rebuke you,
And set them in order before your eyes. 

God concludes Psalm 50 by warning His people:

22 “Now consider this, you who forget God,
Lest I tear you in pieces,
And there be none to deliver:
23 Whoever offers praise glorifies Me;
And to him who orders his conduct aright
I will show the salvation of God.”

My initial reaction was not PRAISE GOD, it was more like...

WHAT?!

After all, the picture painted of God with "fire devouring before Him" and tempestuousness circling around His feet sounds pretty scary for the casual reader!  And what is with God's demand to be praised and thus glorified by His people under threat of being torn to pieces?  Isn't God supposed to be...loving?

My prayer after reading that passage was one of desperation and pained trust in God...I basically begged for God to reveal the truth of the unsettling passage to me as soon as possible!  My faith was wavering, my heart pounding in my ears.  How could one moment's worth of spiritual confusion so quickly reduce me to such a spiritually vulnerable state?  All I knew was that I didn't like it.  

Thankfully, God rescued me just in the nick of time from my pitiful bout of doubt through a wise word from my father, and an insightful book about Jesus (McDowell's More Than A Carpenter).  

    I knew I was missing something, and it bothered the heck out of me all morning until I was able to talk it out with my dad.  After talking with him, I realized that God's demand for praise from His people arose from a deep love and concern he harbored for the fate of all mankind.  He wanted His people to glorify Himself with their thankfulness so the surrounding nations would see God and commit their lives to Him.  God was trying to draw people to Himself, thus keeping as many people out of hell as He could.  When the Israelites became ungrateful and wicked, they were setting a bad example for the other nations!  That is why God was so adamant about their attitude towards Himself; it was not really for His own sake, but for His people's sake that He demanded His people's respect.  He was after all, their originator AND savior from the bondage of Egypt!  

    All in all, today proved to be a spiritually invigorating, long, good day.


    Oh, one more thing (that is a declaration, really):

    May we never shy away from verses that seem difficult or disturbing; instead, let us embrace them as spiritual exercises, strategically placed in His Word to not only cause us to grow in Biblical knowledge and wisdom, but to teach us to trust in God as well!

DREAMER'S CHALLENGE: Day 5

    So I committed to posting the results to my Dreamer's Challenge every day for a week, but Sunday admittedly proved to be a somewhat uninspiring day for me.  It was a day full of activity, to be sure; normally, I would attend the local church and spend the rest of the day driving around with my family visiting friends or eating out, having a wonderfully chaotic, thought-provoking day, but this Sunday was unusual in that I did not do a lot of thinking or reading or planning or talking, but instead, just "doing." Doing simple, wholesome, fulfilling, clean, quiet, perfect little movements...

    To help you understand the difference between "normal doing" and the "doing" I did this Sunday, I have compiled a list of random tasks that I completed yesterday:

1.  I wore a skirt that was so long that it got caught under my feet when I walked,

2.  practiced driving with my dad,

3.  Vacuumed the floor of my bedroom (cat-themed rug and all), 

4.  hung out with a friend I haven't talked to much since 2011,

5.  helped my brother make a commercial advertising his longboards using Windows Movie Maker, and

6.  ate almost an entire box of Oreo's all on my own (dipped in milk, of course).

    I prayed a little bit here and there throughout the course of the day, talked about God and His Word with the people I spent time with, breathed in the beauty of His creation...nothing particularly noteworthy happened, and nothing very important was accomplished, but it was a mostly peaceful day that I would gladly experience again if given the opportunity.  My dream that night was nothing remarkable, either...not a nightmare, but not special by any standards (the happenings in my dream loosely followed those of Suzanne Collin's The Hunger Games). 

     All in all, the whole experience left me without much to write about--except for one thing, now that I think of it:  when caught up in the simple joy of living, sometimes God's message to His child is simply, "Be still, and know that I am God (Psalm 46:10)."  Breathe.  REST.  Be thankful!

   My Sunday was mundane.  Peaceful, bright, happy, uneventful, yes...but a waste of time?  Meaningless?  I don't think so.  I am thankful for the "quiet days" when I can content myself in the delights of God's creation, enjoy doing simple tasks, and rest in His presence.  Sometimes my relationship with God is fast-paced, exciting, an adventure, but on Sundays like these, I am thankful for the chance to just relax and share a brief respite with Jesus.  

    Someday soon, life will be more challenging, exciting...but not now.  For now, the turbulent waters of life are still, and I rest in absolute peace in the eye of a spiritual hurricane.  May you all find insurmountable joy in the miraculous AND the mundane!

DREAMER'S CHALLENGE: Day 4

    Last night God spoke to me in a dream.

    Here's what happened: I prayed, read God's Word, and went to bed, just as I have been doing for the past few days--except, when I woke up, I had an interesting story to share.

    In my dream, I was trekking through a vast, golden tangle of field, tall weeds, and tall, tree-like bushes.  A large group of people that I have been familiar with since I was young but have rarely spoken to were hiking through the underbrush with me.  One of my close friends stuck by my side for part of the journey, but somehow we were separated, and I ended up alone.  I came upon an ominous tunnel of bush and hesitantly decided to crawl through it in hopes of rejoining the others on the opposite side.  The branches seemed to grab at me, and dark forms threatened from all directions--until they came.  Two people that I have long judged since I knew them for their habit of snubbing or disregarding me.  Yet here they were, offering me salvation from the evil clutches of the bushes--and isolation. 

    The three of us ended up walking with each other for the remainder of the trip.  the two were more amiable and down to earth than I would have ever thought possible.  We talked and laughed all the way to our destination: a performing arts center.  Once everybody was inside the building, the two people and I went off together again on our own.  We drifted into a large room where a group of thespians were rehearsing for an upcoming theatrical production.  The three of us sank into a couple of back row seats and continued our comfortable conversing while actors practiced on their stage before us.  Just as I was beginning to wonder why I hadn't ever thought of befriending these wonderful people before, the lights dimmed, and the female lead of the musical began to sing her solo.  All of us immediately quieted because her voice was absolutely mesmerizing.  

    Finally the siren-like voice ceased and the lights turned back on.  As the light returned, however, I sensed something was wrong.  I turned to the two others, made a comment about a Guinea pig (for reasons I cannot recall), and saw something I can't say I didn't expect: the backs of the two people's heads.  They had turned away from me to talk to each other.  I said something else, and they turned and gave me a look that chilled and embarrassed me.  My bad-feeling-instinct was right to have warned me of trouble.  The wonderful chemistry the three of us had previously mutually shared was just gone, obliterated in the time it took me to brush my teeth in the morning...and I?  I stood to my feet and began to walk away, confused, and mourning the loss of our brief friendship.  

    As I was waking up from this dream, my final thought was, "What did I say to offend them?"  

    For a long time, I have disapproved of people who seem to ignore me--people I see every week who do not turn to look at me when I say "hi."  Last night, I believe God confronted me about this flawed thinking through my dream. I have been wrong to think that these seemingly aloof kids are rude or fake or anything, really...because they, like I, are only human! They are simply fallible people who are doing their best to be more like Jesus.  Just because these individuals do not acknowledge me when passing by does not make them bad people. Life is not about Megan, life is about Jesus. Besides, I may not know the full story...perhaps there is something going on that I don't know about?  Only God can see and change people's hearts!  What I should be focusing on, instead of my own pride and self-pity, is "How can I change?" or "How can I be a better friend?"  because in the end, the only person I can change (with Jesus' help!) is myself.  Maybe God will convict these people to be more friendly and sensitive in the future, but for now I should not be offended, but instead humbled, graceful, and encouraging.  

    Jesus warns believers in Matthew 7:1-5:

    Judge not, that you be not judged. For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you. And why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, "Let me remove the speck from your eye"; and look, a plank is in your own eye? Hypocrite! First remove the plank from your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.

 

    If we are confused about someone's behavior toward us, instead of gossiping, grudging, or judging them, let us strive to walk in love and grace, and look at people through the eyes of Jesus (and not through the cracks of the long planks in our eyes)!

DREAMER'S CHALLENGE: Day 3

    So...yesterday I pretty much wasted a perfectly good Friday--or at least, partially.  The day started out well enough, but by eleven o' clock at night, I had wasted a couple of prime God-hours goofing off on the internet just "surfing around."  By the time I reached my bedroom to start winding down before sleep, I was totally disgusted with myself.  I knew better than to goof off like that and waste precious time...and yet I did.  And now it was eleven: too late to redeem the day. 


    I started desperately flipping through my Bible, notes flying all over the place, hoping to stumble upon something poignant--maybe a verse that detailed the curses that came upon those who wasted time.  That would have at least somewhat eased my aching conscience, but NO--God chose to do something to me even worse.  Instead of curses, I found tons of verses that listed the BLESSINGS that came with serving God wholeheartedly.  From the Old Testament to the New Testament, all I saw was blessings, love, forgiveness, mercy, AHHH!!  Where was God's punishing wrath when I needed it?  Just as I began to contemplate storming out the front door of my house and tearing down the street and into the dark night like a raving lunatic, I found the verse I needed to hear (thank God): Ephesians 5:14-17:


Therefore He says: "Awake, you who sleep, Arise from the dead, And Christ will give you light."  See then that you walk circumspectly, not as fools but as wise, redeeming the time, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be unwise, but understand what the will of the Lord is.

Sanity rushed back into my bones.  I could feel the color returning to my drained face.  Here was a verse that seemed to gently rebuke, and offer hope.  I had been bracing myself for hell fire, and here was my loving, merciful God again (Why are you so good to me, God?), advising me to redeem the wasted time...but how?  WHAT could God's will possibly be for me at this late hour?  I  resolved to pray to God for at least two hours (by now it was around 11:30 PM) to show God how serious I was about "redeeming the time."  Instead God sent me my younger brother.

Brother: "Megan, I'm going to sleep in your room tonight so I can try out my new army sleeping bag, and we're gonna' have a good old time staying up late and telling stories and--"

"Uh, tonight's not going to be a good night for that..." I started, but as the words artlessly rolled off my tongue, a few different verses about serving God through loving His people pounced onto my brain:


"whatever you do for the least of these you do for Me [Jesus]..."


"They [the world] will know them [the Christians] by the love that they have for one another..."


"Love your neighbor as yourself..." [how can I love my neighbor if I don't love my brother first?]


So I said, "Sure..."


"YES!"


"...Under ONE condition: we pray together before we go to sleep!"


"Uh, sure...but do I have to pray?"


"Only if you want to..." I consented.


We talked for almost two hours, I on my bed, and he curled up in his sleeping bag on my cat-themed rug.  He told me about his hopes and dreams, mainly sports-related, and I mostly just listened.  It obviously meant a lot to him.

I did some thinking, too...
    God does not just want us to be obedient, He wants us to take INITIATIVE--take action, and find ways to love people!  That requires some effort on my part.  Serving God, after all, is a privilege.  A good friend of mine once told me that when you are really pursuing God, it is always best to stay just outside of your ever-expanding comfort zone.  She is so right.

By 1:00 AM in the morning, we were both exhausted, so after I had prayed blessings over his and my other family member's lives, I turned off my night light and we fell dead asleep.
   I dreamed some bizarre dream that involved ME driving my family (even in my dream THAT was a hellish experience for all) to Publix, we only having three dollars to spend on groceries, and one of my younger brothers wanting to spend all of our money on candy corn. 
    I don't even care what I dream about at this point; I am just happy for the revelation God gave me while I was awake yesterday!  I am happy period.  Despite my failure, I feel strangely triumphant.  God is near, and I can feel it.  I do not have to wonder what the meaning of life is, because I have found it in Jesus Christ!  His love propels me, motivates me, changes me--and changes others in the process.

   ...My contentment does not mean I am quitting the challenge; I feel God has things to show me yet through this entertainment fast!  


   I hope you are encouraged by these posts, and pray that you will have a blessed week: full of love, light, and the joy of the LORD!

DREAMER'S CHALLENGE: Day 2

    It is so true what people say about beauty rising out of the ashes of pain. Last night, after my rocky beginnings with Day 1 of the Dreamer's Challenge, I crawled into the back of my dad's truck, threw my head back, and soaked in the awesome sight of God's stars...and the occasional plane taking off from a nearby airport. Somehow, the combination of these sights prompted me to think of the song Keith Green wrote about God's beauty, "Oh Lord, You're Beautiful."

    I had a good conversation with God, and read Psalm 37 by the light of the stars, street lights, and passing cars' headlights. This psalm is especially meaningful and beautiful, I discovered, when read aloud. I have tried to read this particular psalm before without really "getting it," but last night was different. It was as if I had never read it before. I especially love verses 3-4 and 34-40, but the whole piece is both delicious and rejuvenating.

    The Psalm begins by declaring, "Trust in the LORD, and do good; dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness. Delight yourself also in the LORD, and He shall give you the desires of your heart," and ends on a similar note, " But the salvation of the righteous is from the LORD; He is their strength in the time of trouble. And the LORD shall help them and deliver them; He shall deliver them from the wicked, and save them, because they trust in Him."

    We are not only blessed, but SAVED by God for trusting in Him!  Trust must be pretty important to God, huh?  What separated many of the heroes of the Bible from the people that lived around them in their time was not their own holiness--some of them were drunks, liars, hypocrites, and cowards--but instead was the trust that they had in God.  Sure, they had their doubts at times--many times, in fact--but for some of the time, they trusted God, and it was during those times that God moved them the most.

    I guess the theme of the day must be Keith Green, because I've got another song for you called "He'll Take Care of the Rest" that relates beautifully to this topic:

    After spending some time with God, I slipped back into my house and plopped onto a couch next to two of my younger brothers, twins.  They were watching the movie Eight Below with my dad.  Not wanting to watch TV or leave their company, I ultimately chose to sit at a nearby table and draw illustrations for a possible future installment story idea of mine (HINT HINT).  I prayed a short prayer before crawling into bed, and slept soundly.

    I only remember having one dream, and the details I remember are vague: something exciting was going on, possibly a wedding, and I wrote "I love something" on my arm.  I still don't remember what that "something" was, but the dream was bright, clean, refreshing--not nightmarish.  I feel that God has blessed me for going to Him first.  Psalm 4, the verse that was so ironic to my sleep experience two nights ago, now echoes the peace I experienced last night.

    God's mercies really ARE new each day; praise the LORD!