Are All Christians Called to Heal the Sick?

When it comes to miracles, I admit I tend to be skeptical, or at least doubtful that such displays of God’s power could possibly blossom from my feeble prayers. But lately, God’s been shifting my perspective about miracles, particularly physical healing—not only through life experiences, but through His Word.

To read my full commentary on the crucial subject of healing the sick, please visit Far East Broadcasting Company's brand-new blog, "The Great Commission" at this link (and read my first-ever published article!): http://blog.febc.org/faith/are-all-christians-called-to-heal-the-sick

Ardently Yours,

Megan

Burn as they Burn

The heavens are embedded

With a myriad of stars

That we earthlings look upon

Each night

In wonder



In

Spi

Ring



We sometimes assume

That the brightest stars

Are greatest, but we forget

That they are

Merely closest



De

Cei

Ving



Billions of stars are burning,

Billions of stars are named,

And in this way,

They are all

Alike



Un

Var

Ying



Although not all earthlings can see

All of the stars at the same time,

Or even at all,

God sees

Each one



Sep

Arate

Ly



We are the burning stars with names,

We are burning consequential fires

Let us burn as they burn

Whether man sees

Or not



Relent

Less

Ly

My Valentine, Jesus Christ

 Dear Single AND Married Sisters,

Do you wish that you had an exciting "Valentine" for Valentine's Day?  Dream of being "secretly admired" by Someone strong, smart, selfless, and utterly in love with you in this season of love (preferably Prince Charming, but Mr. Darcy may suffice)?  Look no further; GOD is near!

Are you craving a love letter?  One that makes your "heart leap" (and I don't mean up your throat while hurtling down a steep roller coaster!) for joy?  Try GOD'S WORD--HE wrote it just for YOU (major heart-fluttering)!

Are you looking for a guy who is willing to "risk it all" to save you from evil, and "sweep you off your feet?"  Here comes Prince JESUS on His noble white steed Salvation!  This passionate Prince loves you so ardently that He died for you before you were born so you could spend eternity with HIM in the afterlife (see John 3:16)!  Now THAT is some serious dedication-- love that would challenge even Edward Cullen's!

BONUS: before you love God, He already loves you (1 John 4:19)!

So...what's keeping you from committing your whole life to Jesus, the greatest Lover of your soul?  NOTHING! 

May your heart be full of joy and contentment in this season full of pink cards, red hearts, flowers, love-struck vampires, and overpriced truffles...




I love you guys!!  Thanks to all who read these words...it means a lot!

And...

HAPPY (Belated) VALENTINE'S DAY!!

DREAMER'S CHALLENGE: Day 5

    So I committed to posting the results to my Dreamer's Challenge every day for a week, but Sunday admittedly proved to be a somewhat uninspiring day for me.  It was a day full of activity, to be sure; normally, I would attend the local church and spend the rest of the day driving around with my family visiting friends or eating out, having a wonderfully chaotic, thought-provoking day, but this Sunday was unusual in that I did not do a lot of thinking or reading or planning or talking, but instead, just "doing." Doing simple, wholesome, fulfilling, clean, quiet, perfect little movements...

    To help you understand the difference between "normal doing" and the "doing" I did this Sunday, I have compiled a list of random tasks that I completed yesterday:

1.  I wore a skirt that was so long that it got caught under my feet when I walked,

2.  practiced driving with my dad,

3.  Vacuumed the floor of my bedroom (cat-themed rug and all), 

4.  hung out with a friend I haven't talked to much since 2011,

5.  helped my brother make a commercial advertising his longboards using Windows Movie Maker, and

6.  ate almost an entire box of Oreo's all on my own (dipped in milk, of course).

    I prayed a little bit here and there throughout the course of the day, talked about God and His Word with the people I spent time with, breathed in the beauty of His creation...nothing particularly noteworthy happened, and nothing very important was accomplished, but it was a mostly peaceful day that I would gladly experience again if given the opportunity.  My dream that night was nothing remarkable, either...not a nightmare, but not special by any standards (the happenings in my dream loosely followed those of Suzanne Collin's The Hunger Games). 

     All in all, the whole experience left me without much to write about--except for one thing, now that I think of it:  when caught up in the simple joy of living, sometimes God's message to His child is simply, "Be still, and know that I am God (Psalm 46:10)."  Breathe.  REST.  Be thankful!

   My Sunday was mundane.  Peaceful, bright, happy, uneventful, yes...but a waste of time?  Meaningless?  I don't think so.  I am thankful for the "quiet days" when I can content myself in the delights of God's creation, enjoy doing simple tasks, and rest in His presence.  Sometimes my relationship with God is fast-paced, exciting, an adventure, but on Sundays like these, I am thankful for the chance to just relax and share a brief respite with Jesus.  

    Someday soon, life will be more challenging, exciting...but not now.  For now, the turbulent waters of life are still, and I rest in absolute peace in the eye of a spiritual hurricane.  May you all find insurmountable joy in the miraculous AND the mundane!

DREAMER'S CHALLENGE: Day 4

    Last night God spoke to me in a dream.

    Here's what happened: I prayed, read God's Word, and went to bed, just as I have been doing for the past few days--except, when I woke up, I had an interesting story to share.

    In my dream, I was trekking through a vast, golden tangle of field, tall weeds, and tall, tree-like bushes.  A large group of people that I have been familiar with since I was young but have rarely spoken to were hiking through the underbrush with me.  One of my close friends stuck by my side for part of the journey, but somehow we were separated, and I ended up alone.  I came upon an ominous tunnel of bush and hesitantly decided to crawl through it in hopes of rejoining the others on the opposite side.  The branches seemed to grab at me, and dark forms threatened from all directions--until they came.  Two people that I have long judged since I knew them for their habit of snubbing or disregarding me.  Yet here they were, offering me salvation from the evil clutches of the bushes--and isolation. 

    The three of us ended up walking with each other for the remainder of the trip.  the two were more amiable and down to earth than I would have ever thought possible.  We talked and laughed all the way to our destination: a performing arts center.  Once everybody was inside the building, the two people and I went off together again on our own.  We drifted into a large room where a group of thespians were rehearsing for an upcoming theatrical production.  The three of us sank into a couple of back row seats and continued our comfortable conversing while actors practiced on their stage before us.  Just as I was beginning to wonder why I hadn't ever thought of befriending these wonderful people before, the lights dimmed, and the female lead of the musical began to sing her solo.  All of us immediately quieted because her voice was absolutely mesmerizing.  

    Finally the siren-like voice ceased and the lights turned back on.  As the light returned, however, I sensed something was wrong.  I turned to the two others, made a comment about a Guinea pig (for reasons I cannot recall), and saw something I can't say I didn't expect: the backs of the two people's heads.  They had turned away from me to talk to each other.  I said something else, and they turned and gave me a look that chilled and embarrassed me.  My bad-feeling-instinct was right to have warned me of trouble.  The wonderful chemistry the three of us had previously mutually shared was just gone, obliterated in the time it took me to brush my teeth in the morning...and I?  I stood to my feet and began to walk away, confused, and mourning the loss of our brief friendship.  

    As I was waking up from this dream, my final thought was, "What did I say to offend them?"  

    For a long time, I have disapproved of people who seem to ignore me--people I see every week who do not turn to look at me when I say "hi."  Last night, I believe God confronted me about this flawed thinking through my dream. I have been wrong to think that these seemingly aloof kids are rude or fake or anything, really...because they, like I, are only human! They are simply fallible people who are doing their best to be more like Jesus.  Just because these individuals do not acknowledge me when passing by does not make them bad people. Life is not about Megan, life is about Jesus. Besides, I may not know the full story...perhaps there is something going on that I don't know about?  Only God can see and change people's hearts!  What I should be focusing on, instead of my own pride and self-pity, is "How can I change?" or "How can I be a better friend?"  because in the end, the only person I can change (with Jesus' help!) is myself.  Maybe God will convict these people to be more friendly and sensitive in the future, but for now I should not be offended, but instead humbled, graceful, and encouraging.  

    Jesus warns believers in Matthew 7:1-5:

    Judge not, that you be not judged. For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you. And why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, "Let me remove the speck from your eye"; and look, a plank is in your own eye? Hypocrite! First remove the plank from your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.

 

    If we are confused about someone's behavior toward us, instead of gossiping, grudging, or judging them, let us strive to walk in love and grace, and look at people through the eyes of Jesus (and not through the cracks of the long planks in our eyes)!

DREAMER'S CHALLENGE: Day 3

    So...yesterday I pretty much wasted a perfectly good Friday--or at least, partially.  The day started out well enough, but by eleven o' clock at night, I had wasted a couple of prime God-hours goofing off on the internet just "surfing around."  By the time I reached my bedroom to start winding down before sleep, I was totally disgusted with myself.  I knew better than to goof off like that and waste precious time...and yet I did.  And now it was eleven: too late to redeem the day. 


    I started desperately flipping through my Bible, notes flying all over the place, hoping to stumble upon something poignant--maybe a verse that detailed the curses that came upon those who wasted time.  That would have at least somewhat eased my aching conscience, but NO--God chose to do something to me even worse.  Instead of curses, I found tons of verses that listed the BLESSINGS that came with serving God wholeheartedly.  From the Old Testament to the New Testament, all I saw was blessings, love, forgiveness, mercy, AHHH!!  Where was God's punishing wrath when I needed it?  Just as I began to contemplate storming out the front door of my house and tearing down the street and into the dark night like a raving lunatic, I found the verse I needed to hear (thank God): Ephesians 5:14-17:


Therefore He says: "Awake, you who sleep, Arise from the dead, And Christ will give you light."  See then that you walk circumspectly, not as fools but as wise, redeeming the time, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be unwise, but understand what the will of the Lord is.

Sanity rushed back into my bones.  I could feel the color returning to my drained face.  Here was a verse that seemed to gently rebuke, and offer hope.  I had been bracing myself for hell fire, and here was my loving, merciful God again (Why are you so good to me, God?), advising me to redeem the wasted time...but how?  WHAT could God's will possibly be for me at this late hour?  I  resolved to pray to God for at least two hours (by now it was around 11:30 PM) to show God how serious I was about "redeeming the time."  Instead God sent me my younger brother.

Brother: "Megan, I'm going to sleep in your room tonight so I can try out my new army sleeping bag, and we're gonna' have a good old time staying up late and telling stories and--"

"Uh, tonight's not going to be a good night for that..." I started, but as the words artlessly rolled off my tongue, a few different verses about serving God through loving His people pounced onto my brain:


"whatever you do for the least of these you do for Me [Jesus]..."


"They [the world] will know them [the Christians] by the love that they have for one another..."


"Love your neighbor as yourself..." [how can I love my neighbor if I don't love my brother first?]


So I said, "Sure..."


"YES!"


"...Under ONE condition: we pray together before we go to sleep!"


"Uh, sure...but do I have to pray?"


"Only if you want to..." I consented.


We talked for almost two hours, I on my bed, and he curled up in his sleeping bag on my cat-themed rug.  He told me about his hopes and dreams, mainly sports-related, and I mostly just listened.  It obviously meant a lot to him.

I did some thinking, too...
    God does not just want us to be obedient, He wants us to take INITIATIVE--take action, and find ways to love people!  That requires some effort on my part.  Serving God, after all, is a privilege.  A good friend of mine once told me that when you are really pursuing God, it is always best to stay just outside of your ever-expanding comfort zone.  She is so right.

By 1:00 AM in the morning, we were both exhausted, so after I had prayed blessings over his and my other family member's lives, I turned off my night light and we fell dead asleep.
   I dreamed some bizarre dream that involved ME driving my family (even in my dream THAT was a hellish experience for all) to Publix, we only having three dollars to spend on groceries, and one of my younger brothers wanting to spend all of our money on candy corn. 
    I don't even care what I dream about at this point; I am just happy for the revelation God gave me while I was awake yesterday!  I am happy period.  Despite my failure, I feel strangely triumphant.  God is near, and I can feel it.  I do not have to wonder what the meaning of life is, because I have found it in Jesus Christ!  His love propels me, motivates me, changes me--and changes others in the process.

   ...My contentment does not mean I am quitting the challenge; I feel God has things to show me yet through this entertainment fast!  


   I hope you are encouraged by these posts, and pray that you will have a blessed week: full of love, light, and the joy of the LORD!

DREAMER'S CHALLENGE: Day 2

    It is so true what people say about beauty rising out of the ashes of pain. Last night, after my rocky beginnings with Day 1 of the Dreamer's Challenge, I crawled into the back of my dad's truck, threw my head back, and soaked in the awesome sight of God's stars...and the occasional plane taking off from a nearby airport. Somehow, the combination of these sights prompted me to think of the song Keith Green wrote about God's beauty, "Oh Lord, You're Beautiful."

    I had a good conversation with God, and read Psalm 37 by the light of the stars, street lights, and passing cars' headlights. This psalm is especially meaningful and beautiful, I discovered, when read aloud. I have tried to read this particular psalm before without really "getting it," but last night was different. It was as if I had never read it before. I especially love verses 3-4 and 34-40, but the whole piece is both delicious and rejuvenating.

    The Psalm begins by declaring, "Trust in the LORD, and do good; dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness. Delight yourself also in the LORD, and He shall give you the desires of your heart," and ends on a similar note, " But the salvation of the righteous is from the LORD; He is their strength in the time of trouble. And the LORD shall help them and deliver them; He shall deliver them from the wicked, and save them, because they trust in Him."

    We are not only blessed, but SAVED by God for trusting in Him!  Trust must be pretty important to God, huh?  What separated many of the heroes of the Bible from the people that lived around them in their time was not their own holiness--some of them were drunks, liars, hypocrites, and cowards--but instead was the trust that they had in God.  Sure, they had their doubts at times--many times, in fact--but for some of the time, they trusted God, and it was during those times that God moved them the most.

    I guess the theme of the day must be Keith Green, because I've got another song for you called "He'll Take Care of the Rest" that relates beautifully to this topic:

    After spending some time with God, I slipped back into my house and plopped onto a couch next to two of my younger brothers, twins.  They were watching the movie Eight Below with my dad.  Not wanting to watch TV or leave their company, I ultimately chose to sit at a nearby table and draw illustrations for a possible future installment story idea of mine (HINT HINT).  I prayed a short prayer before crawling into bed, and slept soundly.

    I only remember having one dream, and the details I remember are vague: something exciting was going on, possibly a wedding, and I wrote "I love something" on my arm.  I still don't remember what that "something" was, but the dream was bright, clean, refreshing--not nightmarish.  I feel that God has blessed me for going to Him first.  Psalm 4, the verse that was so ironic to my sleep experience two nights ago, now echoes the peace I experienced last night.

    God's mercies really ARE new each day; praise the LORD!

DREAMER'S CHALLENGE: Day 1

    Yesterday was the first official day of my dream challenge, but it was not until this morning that I received some results from my experiment: two strange dreams, some regret, and a wake-up call.  Allow me to explain.

    While I technically did not watch TV last night (I was working on my laptop), I was in the family/TV room with my younger brothers where I could hear the TV...and without even realizing I was doing it, I followed part of the show with my ears...it was a reality show about a very troubled family that included ten kids void of compassion, and two exceptionally dysfunctional parents.  

    By the time I dragged myself to bed last night, it was very late, and I only managed to read one small section of scripture and release a short prayer before I turned off my bed light and tried to fall asleep.  I tossed and turned for an hour; I was exhausted, and knew I  had to wake up early the next morning, but could not fall asleep due to a dull, sharp pain that totally engulfed my left leg.  I think it was growing pains, but at the time it felt like a punishment.  All I could think was, this is going to sound really weird on my blog tomorrow...and it probably does.

    After dreaming one very strange, disturbing dream that I cannot recall the details of, and one (black and white) dimly lit dream about a group of hilarious dogs that leaped and walked on two legs in circles around me, I finally woke up to the glaring sound of my alarm clock.  Out of bed I fell, crawled, staggered over to my alarm clock to turn the thing off.   Ugh.   
    I read some of Matthew 7, but Exhaustion pressed against me, warm and sweaty in form, making it difficult for me to concentrate on the words.  Although my head was swimming, I felt distinctly drawn to return to Psalm 4: the passage I had meditated on last night.  I was surprised by the ironic shadow the selection of scriptures threw before my painful, seemingly unsuccessful night of sleep (and sleeplessness).  Here are the words of Psalm 4:3-8:

 ​​​Realize that the LORD shows the godly special favor;
the LORD responds when I cry out to him.
​​​​​​​Tremble with fear and do not sin!
Meditate as you lie in bed, and repent of your ways!  Offer the prescribed sacrifices
and trust in the LORD!
​​​​​​​Many say, “Who can show us anything good?”
Smile upon us, LORD!
You make me happier
than those who have abundant grain and wine.
​​​​​​​I will lie down and sleep peacefully,
for you, LORD, make me safe and secure.

    When I honestly assess my actions last night, I see that I probably should have spent my time more judiciously, so that I would not have had to have pushed prayer so late into the night.  Godly people pray first--they do not wait until the very last minute to do the most vital task of the day.  I think last night was God's wake-up call to me to actually SERVE HIM, as I said I would do in my previous blog post, "Love is a Verb."  Writing with God for an audience is an honor and privilege, and I realize more than ever, is a privilege that requires me to be more responsible and diligent to live up to my ideals and assertions.  Harold Nicolson was right when he said:


 We are all inclined to judge ourselves by our ideals; others, by their acts.


    This has been a wonderful reminder from God to me that my actions need to line up more accurately with my words--and I am totally up for the challenge!  I can't wait to see what else God chooses to illuminate within my human, frequently wayward heart...or am I mistaking excitement for fear?  Am I finally living up to Psalm 4, "trembling with fear" and choosing not to sin?  I guess we'll see!  Thanks for reading everybody; you guys provide me really great accountability.  I Hope that all of your weeks prove to be equally enlightening!

Full of and Fixed on the Light

Hey everybody!  I stumbled upon the PERFECT verse for the Dreamer's Challenge during my morning devotional...look at Matthew 6:22-23:

“The eye is the lamp of the body. If then your eye is healthy, your whole body will be full of light.  But if your eye is diseased, your whole body will be full of darkness..."

If we are allowing our eyes to see gruesome, evil, horrific, or even just plain secular movies on TV, are we not "diseasing" our eyes?

By purposely exposing ourselves to wickedness, we open internal gateways that invite evil to come into our hearts, minds, souls.  Not all of us watch a lot of TV; for some of us, it is Facebook that distracts us from God, or fun reading, or a music obsession, or...the list could go on and on.  The idea is that whatever we love, we inevitably fill ourselves with.  If our foremost love is not Jesus, then we are "full of darkness,"  for Jesus is the only true Light of the world; we must always keep this in mind!  After all, 2 Corinthians clearly states that light can have no fellowship with darkness...there is no middle ground here...we must choose whose side we will serve!

So, back to Matthew 6: our bodies cannot be filled with light and our eyes cannot be "healthy" if we choose to fixate are eyes on worldly pleasures instead of on Him.  

    Whatever happens, we CANNOT take our eyes off of The Light of the World: Jesus, the only "filler" that satisfies!  Let us pray, pray some more, and pray more OBSESSIVELY!  

God bless everybody, and sweet dreams!

Why Do We Have Nightmares?

    Have you ever wondered why people—believers and non-believers alike—have nightmares?

   It seems like whenever someone has a dream in the Bible, it is either prophetic or contains a cryptic message for the dreamer that only another person, or the passing of time, can rightly interpret.  All dreams mentioned in the Bible are from God, which begs the question: who are nightmares from, and what is their purpose?

   God could not have designed people to receive dark, troubling dreams.  Are bad dreams simply the after-effects of sin in a fallen world, or is the meaning behind their existence deeper?  Perhaps the devil implants these dreams in our minds, or at least his demon minions.  What about Christians though?  Aren't they supposed to be protected from demons?  Or are we all just watching too many bad movies?

   Last night I had the most troubling dream—one I would never want or be allowed to see if it were a movie.  And yet, there it was, playing in my head in the wee morning hours.  There is no escape from a dream like this, either, and often the dreamer wakes only to feel confused, embarrassed, and disturbed.  Where is God during these freakish night disturbances?  Does He care?

   A friend of mine and her sister have nightmares almost every night--this runs in her family—ones so bad that they have trouble sleeping, and wake up screaming or crying.  These dreams are dark, and prayer does not prevent their nightly occurrences.  Once, after my friend woke up from a particularly bad dream in the middle of the night, she was angry and confused with God for allowing her to suffer.  After praying and bedding with her sister for the remainder of the night, she turned off her bed light to go back to sleep...only to be prompted to look up a random verse that popped into her head.  She tried to push the verse away because she was tired, but she could not clear her mind of the mysterious address: 1 Kings 3:15.  She did not know which verse that was, and did not remember ever hearing the reference before.  After turning on the light by her bed, she flipped to 1 Kings3:15 in her Bible to read:

Solomon then woke up and realized it was a dream.

To my friend, this was like a father coming in to comfort his scared little girl by saying, “It was just a bad dream.”  My friend still does not know why she has nightmares, but she does know that when she does, God is with her, and wants to help her through her trials, whatever they may be.

   Maybe nightmares, like all other trials, are permitted by God to haunt us because He wants us to come to HIM for help and guidance.  I don’t think He enjoys watching people suffer, but sometimes the only way people can find truth is through suffering.  If it takes a series of bad dreams for someone to realize that they need God’s help, then their suffering is ultimately—and mysteriously—worth it.  I don’t know all the answers—heck, I don’t know half, or even a 16^th of the answers!—but I DO know that what it all boils down to is the trust that we have in God.  Solomon councils in Proverbs 3:5:

​​​​​​​

Trust in the LORD with all your heart, ​​​​​​and do not rely on your own understanding.

   Still, I cannot help but wonder if many bad dreams can be prevented.  I wonder what would happen if I stopped watching TV and reading “fun novels” for a week, and started praying and reading God’s Word instead, right before I turned in each night to sleep?  Would the nightmares cease?  This week, I am going to find out—and I think the conclusion will be interesting.

   Every day from Thursday the 12^th to Thursday the 19^th I will post the results of my “experiment” on my blog: what passage I read from the Bible before I fall asleep, and the types of dreams I have each night (if I can remember them).  This is probably something worth doing regardless of the conclusion that is drawn; after all, spending more time with God is never a waste of time!  

   If you like, you can join me by fasting from entertainment and praying instead from Wednesday the 12th to the 18th, and post your experiences beneath my posts as comments.  Who knows; maybe this week will be so successful for us that we might just keep fasting and praying forever!  Ha-ha, I guess we’ll see.  

Dreamers, Let the entertainment fast and nightly praying begin!

Love is a Verb

    I have been thinking lately about the role of a Christian, and of a believer’s love relationship with God. Having only escaped the old works-based-relationship-with-God mentality just this past year, I have been wary of all messages that stress the importance of working for God.  Since my mindset has changed, I have been mostly focusing on God’s thoughts and love for ME. Now, I feel like it is time for me to kind of switch gears and shift my focus from myself to my thoughts and love for HIM—and to serving Him. After all, if God is supposed to be my Father, Husband, and Friend, shouldn't my heart’s greatest desire be to please and serve Him?  In John 13, after Jesus washes His disciple's feet; He explains His actions in verses 12-15:

    So when He had washed their feet, taken His garments, and sat down again, He said to them,  “Do you know what I have done to you? You call Me Teacher and Lord, and you say well, for so I am. If I then, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another’s feet. For I have given you an example, that you should do as I have done to you.

    Obviously, such loving, selfless, pious feelings cannot be merely contrived or forced—only the authentic thing could ever suffice. So…what should be done? Should my heart be buried in the ground and daily watered in hopes of growing a servant's heart?  Should I do some special heart-warming routine? Go to the gym every other day and work my heart out to make it stronger, more enduring? Or is my heart’s condition such a hopeless case that I should go to the hospital and demand a heart transplant—switch my cold, callused, hypocritical, insufficient heart for a stronger, God-approved, more munificent heart? Uh—NO, definitely NOT.

 

    Just as with any love relationship, I realize that if I want to draw closer to God, I have to listen to what He says—learn more about Him, and about what makes Him happy. I will start by 

1) analyzing every line of the love letter He wrote for me—His Word—and 

2) give Him the love and respect He deserves by living according to those precious Words. 

    I didn’t come to this conclusion so decisively until a day or so ago, when I saw my heart attitude towards God implanted in my brother towards my mother. My younger brother makes a habit of declaring a passionate love for my mother—he tells her so every time she is upset with him. Recently, after proclaiming his love for my mother to her and even claiming that he would die for her, he rebelled against her authority to her profound exasperation. She still loved him, but she was disappointed because her son did not show her that he loved her by obeying her. His actions clearly contradicted his words, leaving his passionate declarations of love empty and flimsy without action to support them. 

    At the time, I quietly looked down upon my brother for his duplicity—that is, until I realized that I had the same heart attitude towards God. Even though I say that I love Him, I write about Him, and I do things in His Name, I do not consistently obey His commandments, nor do I acknowledge Him in all of my ways. James 1:23-24 asserts: 

    If anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man observing his natural face in a mirror; for he observes himself, goes away, and immediately forgets what kind of man he was. 

    I know a lot about God’s Word, and I can talk all day about the character of God, but when it comes to me—only silence can prevail. I am so inadequate before God. It is not that I think He loves me less for my inadequacy, it is just that I could do so much better—love God more completely, apply His Word more diligently. 

    I may not be much of a Christian, but at least God is still showing me things. The day my whole life seems “easy” or my knowledge of God seems “complete” or “finished” is the day I need to fall onto my knees and pray for God’s mercy. While I am here on earth, things should not be easy. Peaceful, joyful, yes—but NOT easy. Not perfect—at least on the exterior level. If everything’s right on the exterior level, things are probably messed up on the interior level, because 

1) God allows His children to go through trials in life to make them stronger, and 

2) the devil doesn’t need to attack lukewarm Christians—it’s the wily, hot ones that he’s got to worry about!

    In conclusion, I want to serve God--not because I HAVE to, but because--well, God loves me, and I am HIS friend!  Jesus said so in Matthew 15:15:  


    I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master's business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.


Good friends don't have to be told to serve each other; they serve each other because they love each other.  I know that I will mess up--a lot--but I won't let that deter me from trying as hard as I can to serve God wholeheartedly!

New Day's Resolutions

    Wow, I can't believe its 2012!  It seems like just yesterday I was clinking champagne cups full of apple cider with friends and family, 
declaring, "Happy 2011!"  and toasting the New Year.  The ball dropped in New York City, the stars twinkled overhead outside.  The stars are still twinkling, but now it is 2012. 


  I wonder what this year will be like; what difficult circumstances will I be faced with?  What beautiful moments will I experience?

    Every year millions of people make crazy New Year's resolutions, and I, a teenage girl, am no exception.  My past goals for the year have ranged from writing bestselling novels to mastering my nonexistent gymnast's split to flying out of state to see obscure concerts.  All of these so-called "resolutions" have been unsuccessful for me thus far, but still I hope for future success.  
    Last year my goal was to earn my driver's licence (my learner's permit is on the verge of expiring), but my hopes were in vain.  I have yet to drive myself anywhere without getting "white-knuckle syndrome" on the steering wheel or basically having a mini meltdown in the driver's seat, my distraught mom sweating bullets in the passenger's seat beside me (I am sure sitting in an electric chair would be more comfortable for her at moments like these).  Yep, people make resolutions, but resolutions don't come with "money back guarantees" (unless they are treadmills), and they certainly don't promise certain success.


    But for the past few years now, I have set different types of goals for myself on New Year's Eve, something like a New Year's resolution, but deeper.  I write a small list of "hopes" on the top of my January calendar page, things I hope God will show me, ways I hope to grow spiritually.  It is like a written prayer--and, so far, God has answered me every year without fail.  Last year I prayed that I could draw closer to God, and that I could get along better with my younger siblings.  Not only did God reveal more of Himself and His mysterious grace to me last year, He allowed me the opportunity to grow closer to my brothers.


    It is not as if God takes New Year's Eve prayers more seriously than others...I think that it is just me who makes them special.  Really, I think God wants all of our prayers to feel special, because they are.  That we can converse with the Awesome Creator of the Universe seems like a total miracle to my limited, finite, human brain!  Another flabbergasting notion: God wants us to come to Him with our hearts desires.   In Jeremiah 11:9-12 Jesus says, 


"...Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened. 
    Which of you fathers, if your son asks for a fish, will give him a snake instead? Or if he asks for an egg, will give him a scorpion?  If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!” 


    This is not to say that God will answer every question immediately or even in the affirmative.  Jesus gives us an example of a child asking his father for something that is clearly good for him to have.  If the child had asked for a snake, it would have been irresponsible of the father to grant him his desire!  if God's answer to our prayers is "No" or "Wait" we just have to trust Him and know that He knows what He's doing.  His ways are far above our ways!

    So what is it this year that is weighing on your heart?  Are you struggling with an addiction?  A family problem?  Maybe your heart's desire is marriage, but that special someone does not seem to be coming along as quickly as you would like.  My suggestion?  Pray, and wait on the Lord.  This answer may seem trite, but it is so true.  My heart's prayer for this year is found in Lamentations 3:22-24:



    Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. 
They are new every morning;
great is [God's] faithfulness.
 I say to myself, “The LORD is my portion;
therefore I will wait for him."



Sometimes God is slow to answer because He wants us to trust Him regardless of our life circumstances.  When a person loves another person, they learn to trust that individual.  God wants to have a love relationship with each and every one of us.  In order for that to happen, it is essential that we learn to trust God in every aspect of our lives.

    If God wants you to have the desires of your heart (and if your heart is aligned with His, He most likely will), He will take care of it for you.   in Jeremiah 29:11 God assures His people, "...I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
   My 2012 New Year's resolution?  To pray more, and trust God with all of my hopes and my future.  If I slip up and fall on my butt (which will most likely happen a few times), I am not going to say, "Oh well, better luck next year;" instead I am going to get right back onto my feet and declare a New Day's resolution!  I am tired of trying to hash life out on my own.  I am fed up with living for transient worldly pleasures.  This year, I am going to strive to serve God with my whole heart, and in the process, change the world around me.
    And who knows?  Maybe I'll finally master that gymnast's split this year after all!

STARS

    Sometimes it is hard to believe that God is with us, that He is alive.  When I am in doubt, I need only to look up into the night sky and see His stars to be reassured once more that He is real.  
Sometimes when I can't make sense of life, I climb into the back of my dad's truck at night, lie on my back, look up at the stars, and allow the beauty of His universe to swallow me up...and I talk to God.  Talk to Him unhindered by my earthly troubles, because I am too aware of His glory--and His love--to notice.

    I believe this sentiment is universal; people all around the world look up at the stars every night and are faced with the reality that there is a Creator behind the celestial splendor that they see.  King David proclaims in Psalm 19:

The heavens declare the glory of God; And the firmament shows His handiwork.
Day unto day utters speech,
And night unto night reveals knowledge.
There is no speech nor language
Where their voice is not heard.
Their line has gone out through all the earth,
And their words to the end of the world.

    
    Jon Foreman continues this thought beautifully in his song "Stars."  I included the words below.

Maybe I've been the problem, maybe I'm the one to blame
But even when I turn it off and blame myself, the outcome feels the same
I've been thinkin maybe I've been partly cloudy, maybe I'm the chance of rain
Maybe I'm overcast, and maybe all my lucks washed down the drain

I've been thinking 'bout everyone, everyone you look so lonely

But when I look at the stars,
when I look at the stars,
when I look at the stars I see someone else
When I look at the stars,
the stars, I feel like myself

Stars lookin at our planet watching entropy and pain
And maybe start to wonder how the chaos in our lives could pass as sane
I've been thinking bout the meaning of resistance, of a hope beyond my own
And suddenly the infinite and penitent begin to look like home

I've been thinking bout everyone, everyone you look so empty

But when I look at the stars,
when I look at the stars,
when I look at the stars I see someone else...

Here's the music video:

    The video is admittedly a little strange and theatrical, but that somehow seems appropriate considering the profound subject matter.

    Next time you look at the stars, think of Who created them.  Think of Who created you.  Remember that only God is truly capable of filling the emptiness in your life.  Remember that God, bigger, greater than the entire universe, loves you so much that He became a human and  humbled Himself to the point of death on a cross to make it possible for you to come to Him, despite your flaws.  Despite my flaws.  

    Thank God that there IS Someone Else, and that His name is Jesus Christ, because I could never make it here on earth without Him by my side!

God is Love, not Religion

    I have finally concluded, after many years of struggling, that I utterly abhor the word religion. Allow me to clarify. I hate what religion has been defined as by popular culture: narrow-minded, perfect, dry, holier-than-thou, confusing, bigoted, and—perhaps worst of all—condemning. Too often, people who associate themselves with the word religious also don other words like hypocritical, judgmental, and self-righteous. For me, the word that I always unconsciously associated myself with was the troubling word uncertain. Uncertain of my standing with God and of my eternal fate, I skated along though an existence riddled with doubt and fear. Growing up in a Christian community, I often heard mention of the word grace. People claimed it had something to do with God—but if it did, I did not know what it was. As strange as it may sound, it was neither a stirring sermon nor a shocking miracle that finally woke me from my dark, religious stupor. It was love.

    At a Christian conference that I attended this summer, while praying for forgiveness for my doubtfulness and spiritual inadequacy, a woman’s hand suddenly alighted on my shoulder and she whispered, “He delights in you.” This person told me that God not only delights in me, but that He is pleased with me. Right now. No work was required from me before God loved me. He has always loved me—I know that now. Paul declares in Romans 5:8 that, 


“…God demonstrates his own love for us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” 


 Jesus Christ, God in the flesh, came to earth to die for the sins that previously separated all people from God. By taking on the whole world’s sin, Jesus made it possible for imperfect man to come before a Holy God. Biblical Grace can be defined as this: a free gift God gives to all who will accept it to save souls from hell, and make it possible for us to be with God. Ephesians 2:8 proclaims,


“For by grace you are saved through faith…this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God…” 


 Forever changed and conscious of the mysterious, all-encompassing grace of God, I am finally free of my old uncertainty.

    Doubt does sometimes take transient residence in my heart, but can never stay long before Jesus’ love demands its removal. The greatest proof that I know of for the existence of the God of the Bible is that I can tangibly sense His loving presence in my life. Before I was able to comprehend that God’s grace was real, I was often empty and troubled about my standing with God, but afterwards, I was spiritually resurrected, charged with fresh purpose, and certain of my future residency in Heaven.

    Prior to my revelation of Jesus’ love for me, I was not sure what would happen after I died. I knew there was a heaven and a hell, but believed that I was not a good enough Christian to be confident that I was Heaven bound. As a result, for many years I silently prayed the sinner’s prayer every week at church, and cried myself to sleep some nights due to a crippling fear of hell that rose in my burdened heart. In my mind, forgiveness was a gift God granted to those who believed in Him with enough faith to move mountains. My faith was not sufficient enough to move even a pebble. I was baptized as both a baby and a teen, I had prayed and read God’s
    Word scrupulously, and I had tried to be a bold witness for Christ. I was perfectly religious, and I was utterly missing the fact that my own personal holiness did not determine God’s feelings for me. Grace is grace. Either you receive it and believe God is quick to forgive, or you do not. Ironically, I had grown up in a Christian family and community only to find that my understanding of God’s grace was totally wrong. It matters very little where you are or what you know in your head. If you do not believe in your heart that you are saved by God’s free gift of grace alone, and that He loves you regardless of your spiritual strength, you will be like a man born blind—always surrounded by darkness, and wholly unaware of the incomprehensible beauty that surrounds him.

    The moment my feeble heart grasped God’s love for me was the turning point for my relationship with God. No longer am I fearful of God’s opinion of me. He and I both know I make a lot of mistakes, but He promises to walk me through them. In Philippians 1:6, Paul encourages, 


“For I am sure of this very thing, that the one who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.” 


 Before I had a relationship with Jesus, I often struggled with my identity. Now I am not only certain of my identity, I celebrate it. Once I subconsciously labeled myself as Uncertain, but now I know my true name is Hephzibah, which is Hebrew for “the one the Lord delights in (Isaiah 62:3-4).” 
     When my life is difficult, I do not doubt God’s presence in my life—I cling to it. When I am afraid of what other people think of me, I pray to God for boldness. When the enemy tries to seduce me with his cruel lies—that I am worthless, that God does not love me—I tearfully hold onto God’s promises for my life. Sometimes when I cry out to God for deliverance from the evil in my life, the Lord is quiet. He does not always respond immediately, but He always proves Himself faithful in the end. In Jeremiah 29:11 the Lord comforts those who seek Him with these words, 


“…I know what I have planned for you…I have plans to prosper you, not to harm you. I have plans to give you a future filled with hope.” 


 It is not easy to be a Christian. There are times when I wonder if I am wrong to believe in a God I cannot see with my human eyes—that is, until I remember how many times I have seen Him redeem dark lives, fill previously vacant eyes with light, and grant me peace in hours of turmoil.

    Recently, God proved Himself to be faithful to me while I was praying at church. My spirit had been burdened because of some family issues occurring at the time, and I asked God to deliver me from my painful circumstances. A few minutes later, a friend of mine shared a passage of scripture with me that she felt like God wanted me to read: Psalm 13. In this psalm, David cries out to God, 


“How long, LORD, will you continue to ignore me? How long will you pay no attention to me? ​​How long must I worry, and suffer in broad daylight? How long will my enemy gloat over me? ​​​​​​​Look at me! Answer me, O LORD my God! Revive me, or else I will die!” 


At the end of the passage, he rightly concludes,


“...But I trust in your faithfulness.” 


 These words were exactly what I needed to hear. God had directly answered my prayers! With unflinching conviction I declare that God is not only loving and faithful to save—He is alive. He is here.

    You may think I am positively mad, insecure, or mistaken to believe in an all-powerful God, but I only dare speak veraciously on a subject so essential to all humanity. I have tried to stuff the emptiness in my life with many things, but only God wholly satisfies. My love for Jesus is not just a phase, to be discarded with the changing of seasons; instead, my love for Him defines and gives meaning to my life. Unlike man’s weak love, God’s love is constant, consistent, impartial, and overwhelmingly unwavering in its strength. When Paul defines real love in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a, he is really listing the attributes of God. 


He is patient, kind, never envious, never bragging, not puffed up, not rude, not self-serving, not easily angered, not resentful or glad about injustice, but He rejoices in the truth, bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things, and never ends. 


 God hates religion because it keeps us from seeing His true identity as our divine, loving Father. Just go ahead and ask God to show Himself to you. The Lord will reveal Himself ten out of ten times to the person who seeks Him with a sincere heart. If you do not believe me, discover the truth for yourself. I dare you.