Love is a Verb

    I have been thinking lately about the role of a Christian, and of a believer’s love relationship with God. Having only escaped the old works-based-relationship-with-God mentality just this past year, I have been wary of all messages that stress the importance of working for God.  Since my mindset has changed, I have been mostly focusing on God’s thoughts and love for ME. Now, I feel like it is time for me to kind of switch gears and shift my focus from myself to my thoughts and love for HIM—and to serving Him. After all, if God is supposed to be my Father, Husband, and Friend, shouldn't my heart’s greatest desire be to please and serve Him?  In John 13, after Jesus washes His disciple's feet; He explains His actions in verses 12-15:

    So when He had washed their feet, taken His garments, and sat down again, He said to them,  “Do you know what I have done to you? You call Me Teacher and Lord, and you say well, for so I am. If I then, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another’s feet. For I have given you an example, that you should do as I have done to you.

    Obviously, such loving, selfless, pious feelings cannot be merely contrived or forced—only the authentic thing could ever suffice. So…what should be done? Should my heart be buried in the ground and daily watered in hopes of growing a servant's heart?  Should I do some special heart-warming routine? Go to the gym every other day and work my heart out to make it stronger, more enduring? Or is my heart’s condition such a hopeless case that I should go to the hospital and demand a heart transplant—switch my cold, callused, hypocritical, insufficient heart for a stronger, God-approved, more munificent heart? Uh—NO, definitely NOT.

 

    Just as with any love relationship, I realize that if I want to draw closer to God, I have to listen to what He says—learn more about Him, and about what makes Him happy. I will start by 

1) analyzing every line of the love letter He wrote for me—His Word—and 

2) give Him the love and respect He deserves by living according to those precious Words. 

    I didn’t come to this conclusion so decisively until a day or so ago, when I saw my heart attitude towards God implanted in my brother towards my mother. My younger brother makes a habit of declaring a passionate love for my mother—he tells her so every time she is upset with him. Recently, after proclaiming his love for my mother to her and even claiming that he would die for her, he rebelled against her authority to her profound exasperation. She still loved him, but she was disappointed because her son did not show her that he loved her by obeying her. His actions clearly contradicted his words, leaving his passionate declarations of love empty and flimsy without action to support them. 

    At the time, I quietly looked down upon my brother for his duplicity—that is, until I realized that I had the same heart attitude towards God. Even though I say that I love Him, I write about Him, and I do things in His Name, I do not consistently obey His commandments, nor do I acknowledge Him in all of my ways. James 1:23-24 asserts: 

    If anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man observing his natural face in a mirror; for he observes himself, goes away, and immediately forgets what kind of man he was. 

    I know a lot about God’s Word, and I can talk all day about the character of God, but when it comes to me—only silence can prevail. I am so inadequate before God. It is not that I think He loves me less for my inadequacy, it is just that I could do so much better—love God more completely, apply His Word more diligently. 

    I may not be much of a Christian, but at least God is still showing me things. The day my whole life seems “easy” or my knowledge of God seems “complete” or “finished” is the day I need to fall onto my knees and pray for God’s mercy. While I am here on earth, things should not be easy. Peaceful, joyful, yes—but NOT easy. Not perfect—at least on the exterior level. If everything’s right on the exterior level, things are probably messed up on the interior level, because 

1) God allows His children to go through trials in life to make them stronger, and 

2) the devil doesn’t need to attack lukewarm Christians—it’s the wily, hot ones that he’s got to worry about!

    In conclusion, I want to serve God--not because I HAVE to, but because--well, God loves me, and I am HIS friend!  Jesus said so in Matthew 15:15:  


    I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master's business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.


Good friends don't have to be told to serve each other; they serve each other because they love each other.  I know that I will mess up--a lot--but I won't let that deter me from trying as hard as I can to serve God wholeheartedly!

New Day's Resolutions

    Wow, I can't believe its 2012!  It seems like just yesterday I was clinking champagne cups full of apple cider with friends and family, 
declaring, "Happy 2011!"  and toasting the New Year.  The ball dropped in New York City, the stars twinkled overhead outside.  The stars are still twinkling, but now it is 2012. 


  I wonder what this year will be like; what difficult circumstances will I be faced with?  What beautiful moments will I experience?

    Every year millions of people make crazy New Year's resolutions, and I, a teenage girl, am no exception.  My past goals for the year have ranged from writing bestselling novels to mastering my nonexistent gymnast's split to flying out of state to see obscure concerts.  All of these so-called "resolutions" have been unsuccessful for me thus far, but still I hope for future success.  
    Last year my goal was to earn my driver's licence (my learner's permit is on the verge of expiring), but my hopes were in vain.  I have yet to drive myself anywhere without getting "white-knuckle syndrome" on the steering wheel or basically having a mini meltdown in the driver's seat, my distraught mom sweating bullets in the passenger's seat beside me (I am sure sitting in an electric chair would be more comfortable for her at moments like these).  Yep, people make resolutions, but resolutions don't come with "money back guarantees" (unless they are treadmills), and they certainly don't promise certain success.


    But for the past few years now, I have set different types of goals for myself on New Year's Eve, something like a New Year's resolution, but deeper.  I write a small list of "hopes" on the top of my January calendar page, things I hope God will show me, ways I hope to grow spiritually.  It is like a written prayer--and, so far, God has answered me every year without fail.  Last year I prayed that I could draw closer to God, and that I could get along better with my younger siblings.  Not only did God reveal more of Himself and His mysterious grace to me last year, He allowed me the opportunity to grow closer to my brothers.


    It is not as if God takes New Year's Eve prayers more seriously than others...I think that it is just me who makes them special.  Really, I think God wants all of our prayers to feel special, because they are.  That we can converse with the Awesome Creator of the Universe seems like a total miracle to my limited, finite, human brain!  Another flabbergasting notion: God wants us to come to Him with our hearts desires.   In Jeremiah 11:9-12 Jesus says, 


"...Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened. 
    Which of you fathers, if your son asks for a fish, will give him a snake instead? Or if he asks for an egg, will give him a scorpion?  If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!” 


    This is not to say that God will answer every question immediately or even in the affirmative.  Jesus gives us an example of a child asking his father for something that is clearly good for him to have.  If the child had asked for a snake, it would have been irresponsible of the father to grant him his desire!  if God's answer to our prayers is "No" or "Wait" we just have to trust Him and know that He knows what He's doing.  His ways are far above our ways!

    So what is it this year that is weighing on your heart?  Are you struggling with an addiction?  A family problem?  Maybe your heart's desire is marriage, but that special someone does not seem to be coming along as quickly as you would like.  My suggestion?  Pray, and wait on the Lord.  This answer may seem trite, but it is so true.  My heart's prayer for this year is found in Lamentations 3:22-24:



    Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. 
They are new every morning;
great is [God's] faithfulness.
 I say to myself, “The LORD is my portion;
therefore I will wait for him."



Sometimes God is slow to answer because He wants us to trust Him regardless of our life circumstances.  When a person loves another person, they learn to trust that individual.  God wants to have a love relationship with each and every one of us.  In order for that to happen, it is essential that we learn to trust God in every aspect of our lives.

    If God wants you to have the desires of your heart (and if your heart is aligned with His, He most likely will), He will take care of it for you.   in Jeremiah 29:11 God assures His people, "...I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
   My 2012 New Year's resolution?  To pray more, and trust God with all of my hopes and my future.  If I slip up and fall on my butt (which will most likely happen a few times), I am not going to say, "Oh well, better luck next year;" instead I am going to get right back onto my feet and declare a New Day's resolution!  I am tired of trying to hash life out on my own.  I am fed up with living for transient worldly pleasures.  This year, I am going to strive to serve God with my whole heart, and in the process, change the world around me.
    And who knows?  Maybe I'll finally master that gymnast's split this year after all!